Why does happiness seem so fleeting? Why does the immediate satisfaction of a fun night out, a shopping spree, or getting more likes on that recent Facebook post never seem to last?
We can get a short term rush out of social validation and material gain but if they don’t fulfill some fundamental criteria for happiness then the joy will always be hollow and fleeting.
If you’re not feeling like you used to, it’s okay — many of us go through ups and downs.
It’s part of being human.
The good news is that happiness has been studied for many years and researchers have discovered what you really need to be happy. To be honest, the word happy is being used here as it’s easiest for people to relate, but truly, this is more about achieving lasting peace as opposed to an ever fleeting emotion.
Want to know how to create lasting happiness for yourself? Here’s your recipe, and it only has five ingredients.
For an awesome book on this topic check out The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior.
Health and Energy
There’s nothing that will suck the happy right out of your day like being sick or injured. Health and lasting energy are the foundation for a happy life.
It’s funny though — many of us don’t really take meaningful action to improve our health until we’re in desperate need of it. This is called a ‘deficiency need.’ The best example of this is dental health. You didn’t think flossing was so necessary until you had a massive toothache, did you?
If you want to have a fulfilling life then taking small measures every day to improve your health will be the first place to start.
Action step: Start with a small health habit that you know you could do. Eating a healthy breakfast, eating out less, or taking an extra walk each day are great places to start. Nail your first habit then keep building from there.
Relationships
Aristotle once said, “Man is a social animal.” For you to be happy you need to feel like you are part of a tribe; like people have your back and you have theirs. Maintaining high quality relationships in your life will make the worst of times manageable and the best of times even more amazing. These people don’t need to be around you every day, you just have to know that they are there.
Action step: Make a habit of calling someone you haven’t spoken to in a while each day. Make sure to focus the conversation around the other person. Find out what’s really going on in their life so you can connect on a deep level again. You will be amazed by how happy this will make the both of you and how much more prideful, comforted, and secure you will feel.
Meaningful Work
People are only happy when they feel they are making a contribution of some kind, meaning they are putting in more than they take out. There are three things in your work that you will need in order to feel fulfilled.
- It must be challenging and interesting.
- It must offer opportunities for growth and advancement.
- You like and/or respect your coworkers.
Action Step: If your current work isn’t doing this for you, maybe something else will. Or you can make the best of your situation by looking to make work more fun by challenging yourself to accomplish more, look to impress those up the chain, and be more social with your coworkers. A lot of people are passive in their work life, but if you’re the one who takes charge to be awesome then most people will join you in making work more fun and engaging.
Financial Independence
Making a ton of money isn’t necessary for happiness, but being broke can be a real drain on it. To be happy you just need to be in a place where you’re not worried about money all the time.
Action step: Do more with less. The best things in life are free. Spend more time outside with the people you love and less time chasing fleeting happiness, which is almost always more expensive. I suggest doing a purge of all of your clothing and belongings, getting rid of everything you don’t use on a weekly basis. You’ll be surprised to see how little you really need, and be comforted knowing that you don’t need a lot of stuff to get by each day.
Self Actualization
You are self-actualizing when you are Becoming who you were meant to be. You reach peak happiness when you feel like you are becoming something better each day. We all have dreams that we yearn to make real and none of them are going to be accomplished overnight. What will make you truly happy is moving toward that goal, even by a little each day.
Action Step: choose just one thing you would like to do, but have written off. Reignite that fire in your life by deciding firmly that you are going to do it, no matter how long it takes, and begin immediately to take steps towards accomplishing it each day. Even if you only work towards this goal for 15 minutes each day you are still closer than you were yesterday, and that is something to be excited about!
So there you have it, the five essential ingredients for living a happy and fulfilled life. Getting started on just one of the actions steps written out here will begin to make your life more meaningful and enjoyable. The more of these ingredients that you can bring in to your life, the happier you will be. It’s that simple. So what are you waiting for? Get cooking!
Source: By Maverick Wilson
http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/08/19/5-essential-keys-to-true-lasting-happiness/
We all have different goals in life – to find love, lose weight, find meaningful work, etc. But the underlying pursuit is, simply put, to be happy.
Recent research reveals that happiness is attainable, if we choose to cultivate it. While happiness might appear to be beyond our grasp, the new science of Happiness Creation says, “Yes! ” You can rewire your brain to experience higher happiness levels, and it’s not as difficult as you might think.
These 12 habits will elevate your mood, supercharge creativity, amplify charisma and boost productivity.
1. Limit Media (especially Social Media)Consumption.
An experiment by The Happiness Research Institute (yes, there really is such a place!) found that after one week without Facebook, study participants reported significant increases in life satisfaction.
2. Zone Out.
In this age of hyper-connectivity doing nothing may seem somehow wrong. But scientists have discovered that your brain actually needs downtime to reset itself. Emma Seppala, Ph.D. author of The Happiness Track says, “Instead of spending all your time focused intently on your field, make time for idleness, fun and irrelevant interests.” Downtime will make you more creative and leads to fresh ideas.
3. Be Your Own Best Friend.
Beating yourself up is counter-productive to happiness. When your self-critic is on your back, ask, “Is this how I would speak to my best friend, my child or loved one?”
Idea: Practice loving kindness and compassion on yourself. Make self-care, self-love and self appreciation a living mantra.
4. Be Selfish.
It turns out that putting your own needs first may not be selfish after all. Research conducted by Harvard and University of California-San Diego professors found that people who are surrounded by happy people are more likely to become happy in the future. In fact, they found that happiness extends up to three degrees of separation! You are a unique and gifted individual. Your not pursuing your own happiness is actually detrimental to others. So go after your passion – your happiness will be infectious and others will thank you!
5. Dream About Your Future.
Imagining your ideal future and writing it down (as if it’s already happened) induces positive feelings. As does creative visualization. See, feel, and embody the future you want to experience. Do this in meditation or your journal – or both.
Idea: Spend 10 minutes per day envisioning and feeling how you would like your life to be. Dream it up and write it down in the present tense.
6. Pursue Happiness Instead of Success.
Our culture equates busy-ness with success. But super-busy people are often stressed, overwhelmed and exhausted. And happier people get more done.
We are conditioned to think that pursuing success will make us happy, but the opposite is true. Pursuing happiness will make you more energetic, motivated, creative, charismatic and fun to be with.
Idea: Make a list of things that make you happy and build them into your daily routine. Start first thing in the morning. Ask yourself, “What can I do today to feel more happiness?” And then just do it.
7. Make Happiness a Habit.
Routines and habits are great because they enable us to get things done without thinking. Devise some daily habits and routines that generate more happiness.
Idea: Dr. Christine Carter, who I recently interviewed on Theatre of the Mind says, “Start with the easiest possible habit.”
Think of something you can do that has a built in reward that would make you happy if you did it every day. An afternoon walk? Yoga? Dance? Meditation? Dreaming about your future?
8. Be Present.
Some of the most happy, successful people share an extraordinary trait. They are able to be fully present. When you are with someone who is fully present, you feel their light shine on you, and for a brief moment you feel as if you are the most important person in the world. According to brain researchers, our mind wanders about 40% of the time. We tend to chase after the future or mull over the past, which often leads to unhappiness. Give yourself and others the gift of being fully present in the moment—even if it’s only for five minutes at a time. Research shows it will significantly raise your happiness set-point.
9. Practice the Power of “No.”
Decide your top 5 priorities and say “no” to everything else. When you focus on what makes you happy and what is most important to you, life re-orders around your needs. You don’t need to be a brain scientist to know that when you do what you love, you are happiest.
10. Pay Attention to the Details.
Why is buying a ten dollar bouquet of flowers for your home every week more happiness-inducing than purchasing a single forty dollar bouquet? Why will spacing several weekend getaways over the course of the year make you happier than a single two week long vacation? Author Ron Friedman explains that each of us has a “happiness baseline” and the best way to to remain above our baseline is to experience smaller, more frequent pleasures rather than a single, big boost.
11. Forget the Joneses.
If you’re coveting your neighbor’s new car, longing to have the most expensive handbag or dying to one-up your co-worker’s tropical vacation, consider this research published in The Journal of Research in Personality. We’ve always heard that ‘things” do not make you happy, and now there’s data to prove it. Scientists found people who are highly dependent upon material possessions find it harder to be grateful, whereas those who are not reliant on possessions score much higher in life satisfaction.
12. Connect with Others.
Evidence suggests that a sense of community and belonging is a fundamental motivator in human interaction. A paper published in the Psychological Bulletin of the American Psychological Association found that we have a need to form relationships, and those relationships have strong effects on our emotional well-being. Thinking of joining that club? Have a friend you haven’t spoken to in awhile? Need a date night with your spouse? Take the time to do the things that will connect you to others, it’s proven to make you happier!
Source:
http://www.brainsync.com/blog/12-habits-of-the-happiest-people-on-earth/?mc_cid=4569c87a93&mc_eid=7384b10fb5
